PHOTOS AND WRITING BY MONIKA CSAPO
Sleep deprivation and affirmations
Today morning I kept on waking up and falling asleep and waking up and falling asleep again I am not sure why. Once when I looked at the clock it was exactly 5:55 am. It happens to me often that when I wake up in the middle of the night it is 2:22 or 4:44 or some other time with even numbers. I always feel a perv joy to catch a "rare moment".
Waking up continously made me tired and stressed and after a while the good friend of tiredness and stress-anxiety knocked on the bedroom door too. To calm myself down I was reading Louis L. Hay and Hellen Keller quotes which helped. I have the experience that sleep deficit influences my day very negatively so when I happen to have a morning like this I always try to use every tool to neutralize a bad night.
I also meditated which did not go smoothly first but when I moved to an other room with an open window and fresh air it started to work more and more. I sometimes think that meditation or affirmation are too fancy words what scare people off from the actual action but I like the activities themselves. And I think they can work for everyone if they can put their prejudices aside.
Before noon I found my external hard drive what I thought I had at an other place so I copied some old photos from it to my computer and was publishing some on Instagram. Instead of publishing and checking how "it goes" I decided to check may be once max twice and let the photos rest. It is something I want to work on and apply in the future. Of course I take photos to share how many beautiful things surround us and to connect with like-minded people but especially because of this it can not/should not become a confirmation/approval-struggle. I think if someone talks and writes more intuitivly it helps to fight this dark side of social media and oneself. It is mostly about how genuine the message is and how well someone knows the reason why he is doing certain things. If you know the motive you can let go of the rest.
A random act of kindness
Yesterday something nice happened to me in the gym. I was doing squats and a girl stepped to me and gave me some advice about how to do them correctly. I really think it was such a genuine gesture. Later we talked about other gym-related and nutrition topics and I had to state again that it is nice to walk around with an open eye because care and kindness can emerge so often from places we would not think of. Also it was great to talk about these topics honestly with someone without pretense or rivalry.
In the forest
Back to today: the best thing of the day was a random excursion to my Mom's village where I spent most of my childhood holidays. I will publish some of today's photos in a separate post but here are two photos of the mushrooms I found under the pine trees. Which has it's own story what I will write about probably some time later together with an other topic.
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